HAPPENINGS

Howdy. It's been over a month since I posted anything, and I haven't actually written anything since my "GRIPES" post, which prompted my grandfather to ask my mom, "She's not going to commit suicide or anything, is she?" Yikes. No, Grandpa, I'm not; things are just a little less than ideal right now, that's all. But quite a few things have happened in the last month, and I thought I'd tell you about them, mostly because Ian comes here to read posts, discovers none, and becomes sad.

So Ian, this is for you. And for Toob Sox. And Soda Diet. And of course, Swami Swams and Band of the Name. By the way, Ian, call Aaron about the website.

First of all, the above picture is of Philip and me in Vermont. We flew up to Boston a couple weeks ago to visit Philip's good friend Michael, who was a great host and treated us to some New England fun for a couple of days. We saw the fall colors in Vermont (who would have thought I'd miss fall so much?), picked apples at an orchard and walked the Freedom Trail in downtown Boston. I also got my geeky Passport to Your National Parks book stamped at ALL FOUR BOSTON LOCATIONS. This is no easy feat, people. Michael even had to do a little breaking and entering for one of the stamps.

RELEVANT has moved office locations. This means that I actually have space to breathe and a big desk. AND, after two years of employment at Relevant Media Group, I now have ... my very own phone extension. Can you stop me now?

My sister Sarah turned 17 on Oct. 14. When I left home for college, she was 10. What the crap is going on?

Sarah and Blake Kearney celebrated their one-year anniversary. In Seattle. In an isolated cabin in the woods. Marriage ... must be nice. Philip and I got them a Lonely Planet for the Southwest for a gift, so hopefully they'll be able to get some good use out of that.

Women of God Bible Study has come to an end. We did our last lesson last night. Did God do everything I wanted Him to? Nope. Did He do a lot of things I never expected? Definitely.

My new roommate Tinna bought two white cats. Their names are Angel and Soul, but technically, however those words are spelled in Icelandic. They're very affectionate. When I was a little girl, I always wanted a white cat. In fact (I'm hesitant to admit), I owned quite the collection of white cat figurines. And now I have two. Funny how God grants our desires ...

At work, I'm editing a book called Simplicity by Stavesacre frontman Mark Salomon. You should read it; you will like it. Especially you, Susan, since you enjoy memoirs. I laughed. I cried. I was educated about the origins of Christian hardcore music. Seriously, his story is compelling, and I'm extremely glad RELEVANT is republishing this originally self-published book (even though we, like the sellouts we are, have to delete all the profanities). Mark is also a good person, and he told me I have to write 1,500 words a day, which is "nothing once you get into the habit." Sure, Mark. So this is my 1,500 words for today (alright, not quite). He also recommended I read On Writing by Stephen King. Maybe if I quit my job to become a rock star, I would have time for these endeavors.

Last weekend, I went to my first pro football game. The Dolphins beat the Rams, and I had the pleasure of learning the intensely complicated Miami Dolphins song. Good times.

This weekend, Philip and I are hosting a giant fall bash. We literally invited over a hundred people. Granted, I don't know about half of them, but still, it should be a good time. If you're in the Orlando area, you should come out. It's at 7:30 on Saturday, Oct. 30 at my house, and it's BYOP - bring your own pumpkin for carving. AND, wear a costume. I won't say who I'm going as, but I'll give you a clue: She has a laniard collection.

Well, I think that covers the main events. Thanks for stopping by.

JESUS ROCKS

Agreed.

INEXPERIENCE

NA is undergoing some changes (mostly due to my internet ignorance).

Please bare with this older version of the site while I monkey around in the background. GY!BE will get us through this. I promise.

DON'T READ IF YOU'D RATHER NOT HEAR SOME GRIPES

I've had a fairly stressful string of things happen in my life lately. I don't want to sound all woe-is-me or anything, but it's like I start to wonder if I'm crazy. I look around, and most of my twentysomething contemporaries seem busy, but not overloaded; they seem somewhat stressed, but not haggard (thanks, Thesaurus.com); they seem to be burdened by a small aggravation or two, but not buried by several distressing situations. Then I look at myself, especially over the last few weeks. I've been crying; I've been cursing. I've had nightmares; I've driven Philip nuts by my constant complaints. He actually thanked me for not talking about work over dinner the other night. That can't be good.

I go to bed at night feeling nervous, like I'm forgetting something or neglecting someone. I wake up tired and overwhelmed by the day that stretches in front of me. And I wonder, What is wrong with me? Do I have depression? Am I just a characteristically unhappy person? Is the problem my attitude? My lack of quiet times?

But consider that in the last three weeks:
1. I returned home from vacation to a dead car battery and a leaking roof.
2. A good friend got in a car wreck that has left her on bedrest for a month and a half, and she is experiencing pain spasms and uncontrollable twitches.
3. Hurricane Francis came, requiring us to cover my entire house with plastic and make five trips to the dump to get rid of the debris in my cul-de-sac, which was in danger of becoming "dangerous projectiles."
4. Hurricane Francis prevented Philip and I from traveling to IL to visit my family, which was severly disappointing.
5. A close friend and coworker was unexpectedly fired from my workplace.
6. A former roommate moved out of my house, and a new roommate moved in.
7. A large praise concert event at my church was causing some dissention and worry among my church peers, and we needed to step in to help pull the plans together.
8. Philip had a birthday, which I of course wanted to help make very special for him, despite the time-sucking events of recent days.

I guess I'm just looking for persmission to feel stressed. I guess what I want is validation, the assurance that I'm not just a whiney wimp who will never be satisfied, who just needs to pray and read her Bible more in order to get a grip on life. And I just want it to stop, you know? I want a break. I don't mean that I want a problem-free life. I just want a free night at home once in a while. I want to feel like I'm living with balance and intentionality and purpose and not just desperately trying to keep the plates spinning. And stuff like that.